Radio Gaga

I was on the radio this morning. My clip was about 20 seconds long.
The Edge morning show asked their listeners to call in and tell them the weirdest place they had gone to the bathroom.
They where worried things would get too graphic and the stories where taking too long so by the time they got to me they where in rapid fire mode and all they wanted to hear was where it happened. My story got turned into something like this:
"My roommate; in his closet. 2 months later, walks through the bathroom and goes into our neighbors closet." They laughed and talked about it for about 10 more seconds and then went onto the next caller. If you where listening to The Edge 103.9 this morning at about 7:32ish I was the first caller after they took a commercial break, and the first of the "rapid fire" callers. I didn't hear it, but my wife says it didn't sound like me on the radio.

I had a great story that would have taken about 15 more seconds to tell and would have made the hilarity of the situation even greater but I was following the rules so that my story would get on the air. BTW for things like this they didn't go live. They talked to me while a song was playing and recorded the entire conversation, when the song was done they just played the clip. I thought that was an interesting workaround for saving that emergency "dump button" for errant swear words, or maybe it was just so they could cue up as many stories as possible and remove any dead air time.

Anyway.. I feel the story needs to be told in a more robust and less "embellished" nature.
I was not actually present to witness the acts but I heard about them first hand in the fashion that all great stories in the military are retold.. the very next day. When I was in the Marine Corps my friend Scott Kruse told me a tale of his roommate Ian Cole. Ian came home drunk one night and passed out on his bed. A while later he gets up, stumbles over to the wall locker and proceeds to relieve himself in it. It left a rather lingering odor, and as my fuzzy memory serves me, it wasn't his wall locker, it was Scott's and a large amount of clothing was stored at the bottom of the locker. A number of weeks later Ian once again gets up and stumbles toward the wall locker but Scott is keenly aware of the past transgressions and re-routes Ian towards the head. Ian walks through the head and into the neighboring room (keep in mind that in the barracks 2 rooms share a bathroom). Ian can not open the neighbor's wall locker because it is locked (as it is supposed to be) so Ian just pees on the wall locker, the wall, and the very cheap carpeting.

Oddly enough this is not how Cole got the nickname of "Head."